Pee Truth
by fr334eva
Summary: Kyle finds out that Stan is different and hates him but then the world will change all around them and destroy some ancient evil of humans. This is a rewrite of the episode called Pee.
1. Chapter 1

Hello I am rewriting the episode of South Park called Pee because I liked it and it had some good things but I think it could be a lot better. This is based on some true experiences of my life and my own beliefs.

Pee Truth

Chapter 1. Drink.

It was a nice day to swim in the water park. Friends Kyle, Stan, Kenny, Jimmy, and Butters were having a good time swimming. Cartman came too but he ran away from them before and they didn't care. Then Kyle screams. "BUTTERS GROSS WHY DID YOU PEE IN THE POOL??????????"

"Everyone pees in the pool Kyle." Said Butters.

"Yes I just did too." Said Jimmy.

"Me too." Said Kenny.

"WHAT??????????? THAT IS GROSS!!!!!!! HOW COULD ANYTHING IN THIS POOL BE GOOD IF EVERYONE PEES IN IT? I AM NEVER GOING IN THE POOL AGAIN!" Screamed Kyle.

Stan was also like his friends that were not screaming. He did not think it was gross. Actually he had a thought while Kyle kept screaming. He knew that people could find out a lot of things from pee and he wondered how much he could find out from drinking the pool water. There was so much pee life in it that he could find out a lot. He puts his hands in a scoop and he scooped. He sipped and surely tasted all the molecules of pee. He felt the happiness of all of that pee. He smiled and scooped more and drank more. He was trying to get into the zone of goodness that pee provides. But Kyle screamed to his face. "STAN WHAAAAT ARE YOU DOING???"

"I was just having a nice drink." Said Stan.

"WHY? WE JUST TALKED ABOUT HOW THE POOL IS FULL OF PEE AND THEN YOU DRINK IT!!!!!!" Screamed Kyle.

"Yes that is what I did." Said Stan.

"WHY I SAID WHY WOULD YOU EVER DO THAT? THAT POOL IS FULL OF PEE YOU COULD HAVE DRANK PEE!!!!"

"Who cares Kyle."

"WHO CARES IF YOU DRINK PEE??? YOU SHOULD CARE."

"I do care!!!! That is why I drink my own pee every day!"

Kyle stopped screaming and there was tears in his eyes. "Stan what??? That is a joke??"

"It is not joke Kyle. I drink my pee every day and I will keep doing that forever."

"So you are my best friend and also a pee drinker???"

"Yes. That is the truth Kyle. I am a pee drinker."

Kyle cried. "WELL! You are not my best friend anymore Stan! There is no way my best friend would be a pee drinker!!!!!!!!! So since you are a pee drinker you are not my best friend! GO DROWND IN ALL THAT POOL OF PEE!!!!!!!!"

Kyle ran away from them all. Stan looked at him run and also had tears. He couldn't believe that someone would hate him so much just for drinking healthy and wonderful pee. Especially Kyle who was his best friend! Or maybe just used to be!!!!

Meanwhile the owner of the park met with his lawyer and the government.

"THERE CAN NOT BE SO MUCH PEE IN ONE AREA. SHUT DOWN THIS PARK AND BURY IT IN CONCRETE." Said the government people.

"Go away. This is his park and it is safe. There are not bad things in the pools. There is never one case of anyone getting sick from this wonderful water park." Said the lawyer.

"Fine. We warned you. We are not responsible for what we will do to you and all of the innocent people in this park. You are!!!! For refusing to listen to government rules YOU ARE!!!!" Said the government people.

"He is breaking no laws!!!!!!" Said the lawyer.

"Ha ha you know we are not talking about laws of this country! We are talking about the rules of all countries. The ancient rules of this world. YOU ARE GOING TO RUIN THE ANCIENT TRADITIONS OF THE ENTIRE PLANET." Said the government.

"Well it's not against the law so go away." Said the lawyer and they did.

"Thank you for your help my friend lawyer." Said Pi Pi.

"You are welcome but did you know what they are talking about?" Asked the lawyer.

"Yes I do. It will probably happen today so I think you want to leave. I am tired of ancient traditions. Today we will end all of that!!!!!!!!! Today is the new world!!!!!!!!!!!! I have planned this from the beginning and now the prophecy will happen!!!!"

"Ok well I will leave." Said the lawyer.

To Be Continued.


	2. Chapter 2

Pee Truth

Chapter 2. Hate.

"Stan you know all that pee drinking talk was pretty gross." Said Jimmy.

"Yeah it was funny but gross." Said Butters.

"It's not funny it's the truth!!! I have been a pee drinker for my whole life! I don't understand why these pee secrets are even secrets!" Stan yelled.

"Pee secrets?" Asked Butters.

"That's right, pee secrets!!!! There are ancient secrets about the power of pee! The truth is everywhere but people ignore it!!!! All they do is say ew gross just like you guys or even start to hate me like Kyle now does!!!! Well guess what I hate all of you for hating my pee drinking!!!! I WISH YOU WOULD ALL SHUT UP FOREVER." Said Stan.

"OK whatever Stan." Said Jimmy.

"Sorry I guess I don't really hate you but I hate to think that even people like you Jimmy who just say whatever aren't hurting me you are hurting yourselves. If everyone only would stop burying the secrets of pee everyone would be so happy." Said Stan.

"Secrets of pee??? Pee contains happiness??? Maybe I should drink some pee." Said Butters and Jimmy beat him up.

Pi Pi looked down at his water park. "Yes today the hidden secrets of pee will be brought to life at last!!!!!!" He said.

Kyle walked around he was angry so angry. He kicked things and he spat in the pee water. "Pee I hate pee and I hate Stan too."

"Hi Kyle there are too many minorities in this park." Said Cartman.

"Shut up you fatass. Who care about you and your idiot talk about minorities. There are no too many minorities!!! But there is too much pee!!! And pee drinkers!!!!"

"Ha ha so you found out about Stan's pee drinking?" Said Cartman.

"Yeah you mean you knew and I didn't??????????" Said Kyle.

"Yeah I thought it was funny that Stan was so crazy. But he is still my friend so I kept it a secret so he wouldn't go into crazy house." Said Cartman.

"Crazy house???? Pee drinking is bad but it is not CRAZY."

"Yes so crazy. Stupid pee drinkers do not know the pee goes into their brain and starts to kill them."

"What how do you know?" Said Kyle.

"Because pee is made of crazy. Don't you know this Kyle? It is the crazy waste that is why we get rid of it."

"Shut up just shut up crazy waste does not even make sense!!!! But I hate Stan the pee drinker so much right now I do not care if he goes to crazy house!!!!" Said Kyle.

Above them the government flew. There were real crazy people with crazy hateful eyes. "Before the magic of pee gets out into the open we will stop them!!!!" They said and dropped a bomb.


End file.
